Friday, September 3, 2010

What Lies Ahead


This is what its all about, me going away, leaving everything I know to begin a creation of me and who I am to become in the future.

The little moments are the things that mean the most to me these days, the insignificant. The ones that are taken for granted every moment of every day. Our family bonding trip has come and gone. As long as a year and yet as short as a second. I feel as though they mean even more to me now, even though they have always been my everything. The trip made me realize how much I appreciate each and everyone of them for both their flaws, their amazing features and personality quarks. Usually spending 5 days in the wilderness with the same 5 people can become trying on ones character, however that was not the case this time around. We all came together and in a way became one. Making it all the more difficult to say goodbye.

I'm going to miss the way we all gang up on Oliver (john john), and the way we are all up for anything, from sailing in canoes (almost capsizing more than once) to sleeping outside under the stars and partaking in sleeping bag wars. The way we make use out of what we have...playing baseball with a driftwood bat and rocks off the shore, drinking our water from our available resources, after purification. And the way we all get excited to go to the beach when a hurricane is hitting the Maine coast. Always the highlight of our falls.

I'm going to miss the always eventful nights out with our two best friends. The ritual yet variation of each time. The reassurance that someone always has my back and will be there for me, but that won't be as helpful 1,000's of miles away.

I feel as though as the days creep by and the date approaches more quickly that it is all a dream, I can't imagine it anymore, myself over there, myself even leaving. It's as if I'm floating not really realizing what is about to come.